Funny quotes....You'll smile at some of these - Sportbike Forums : Sportbikes Motorcycle Racing Forum
 
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-28-2002, 07:49 AM Thread Starter
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Funny quotes....You\'ll smile at some of these

I just cut a pasted....sorry

WONDERFUL QUOTES
>
>
> "Women might be able to fake orgasms, But men can
> fake whole
> relationships." -- Sharon Stone
>
> "My girlfriend always laughs during sex---no matter
> what she's reading."
> -- Steve Jobs (Founder: Apple
> Computers)
>
> "Instead of getting married again, I'm going to
> find a woman I don't like,
> and just give her a house." -- Rod Stewart
>
> "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and
> a penis, and only
> enough blood to run one at a time." - Unknown
>
> "I saw a heavy woman wearing a sweatshirt with
> "Guess" on it. I said,
> "Thyroid problem?"-Arnold Schwarzenegger
>
> "Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a
> sport for black men.
> Golf
> is a sport for white men dressed like black
> pimps." -- Tiger Woods
>
> "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a
> son-of-a-bitch."
> --Jack Nicholson
>
> "Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or
> where he lives, but he
> never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
> -- Barbara Bush
> (You didn't think Barbara had a sense of
> humor?)
>
> "Ah, yes "divorce" from the Latin word meaning to
> rip out a man's genitals
> through his wallet."-Robin Williams
>
> "Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I
> think of it as the only
> time of the month that I can be myself."-
> Roseanne
>
> "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a
> place." --Billy Crystal
>
> "According to a new survey, women feel more
> comfortable undressing in
> front
> of men than they do undressing in front of other
> women. They say that
> women
> are too judgmental, while, of course, men are just
> grateful."-Robert de
> Niro
>
> "There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting
> that many men are
> having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say
> they cause severe
> swelling. So what's the problem?"-Dustin
> Hoffman


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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-28-2002, 08:16 AM
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Location: Toronto, Canada
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Re: Funny quotes....You\'ll smile at some of these

[img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img][img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img][img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img][img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img][img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img][img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

Michael

Bridge and sex have a lot in common. If you don't have a partner you need a good hand. Groucho Marx

Michael

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.
- Albert Einstein

Drink Ale - Live Lager
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-28-2002, 11:04 AM
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Re: Funny quotes....You\'ll smile at some of these

[img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] at cinmike lol
and [img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] at the quotes...very very funny

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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-28-2002, 11:17 AM
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Posts: 3,570
Re: Funny quotes....You\'ll smile at some of these

I love the "Thyroid problem?" one [img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

[img]C:\My Documents\My Pictures\13-74582-gunther.bmp[/img]

My favorite part of the circus......elephant crap the size of pumpkins...AMAZING
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 08-28-2002, 12:52 PM
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Re: Funny quotes....You\'ll smile at some of these

I was so busy I didn't have a chance to preview my message. I fixed it. Happy now , Willie? Glad I could bring a [img]/images/icons/smile.gif[/img] to your day.

Michael

Bridge and sex have a lot in common. If you don't have a partner you need a good hand. Groucho Marx

Michael

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.
- Albert Einstein

Drink Ale - Live Lager
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