MotoGP: 2017 Round 01 - Grand Prix of Qatar Losail International Circuit (SPOILERS) - Sportbike Forums : Sportbikes Motorcycle Racing Forum
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 03-22-2017, 12:16 PM Thread Starter
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MotoGP: 2017 Round 01 - Grand Prix of Qatar Losail International Circuit (SPOILERS)

Circuit Information

LENGTH: 5.4 km / 3.34 miles
CORNERS: 6 left - 10 right
WIDTH: 12 m. / 39.37 ft.
LONGEST STRAIGHT: 1068 m. / 3503.94 ft.
Laps: 22
Total distance: 118.4 km / 73.5 miles

A long time ago, on a racetrack far, far away....

Episode IV: A New Hope

It is a period of technical war. Rebel engineering teams, striking from a hidden garage, have won their first victory against the evil Noale Empire.

During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the HAMMERHEAD FAIRING, an armored cowling with enough aerodynamic power to blow the clothes right off a grid girl at 40 yards while the bike is on its kick stand.

Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents, Princess Lowes races home aboard her trailer, custodian of the stolen plans that can save her team and restore prestige to the factory....

EXTERNAL: A large, garishly colored MotoGP transport streaks through space. It is intermittently lit by bright flashes of laser pointers reflected from the neon and pastel decals. One of the laser points disables a tire and it shudders to a halt as it is consumed by the mega commercial two truck that hovers behind it.

INTERIOR: The hallways of the transport are the site of a brief an fruitless battle. Inept technicians hurl momma jokes only to be cut down mercilessly by internet memes. In a deserted corner away from the battle, a lone figure in a white dress whispers instructions to an autonomous 125cc scooter before it scuttles away just before a dark figure rounds the corner.

Darth Rider: Princess Lowes. You thought that you could escape the reach of the empire.

Lowes: Darth D'al Igna. You'll....

Darth Rider: Wait. You're not a chick! What the hell man? Why are you in a dress.

Lowes: You're dressed like Superman and The Gimp woke up after a drunken night with more questions than answers. Don't judge.

Darth Rider: Er... fair enough. I mean... ENOUGH! Tell me where you hid the plans for the Hammerhead and I might let you break into the top 10.

Lowes: Never. Once our engineers see the kinds of radical designs allowed this year we'll create a more powerful aerodynamic weapon than you can imagine and crush you. Dal'Igna or no Dal'Igna.

Darth Rider: We will see about that, "princess". Take him away. And search this transport from top to bottom. We must find those plans! I'm going back to sleep.

INTERIOR: A rustic mud-hut with sparse decor. An old man in dusty robes sits with a young boy in the cusp of manhood. The pair huddle around the autonomous 125cc scooter as it projects a hologram of Lowes from its high beam. The image appears to be speaking directly to the old man.

Hologram: Help me Obi-wan Rossi. You are our only hope.

Rossi: (Sighing heavily) I see. This is no co-incidence Maverick. It was your destiny to bring me this message. You were led here by the Pace.

Vinales: The Pace? Isn't that just some mumbo-jumbo cult that meets out in backwoods planets, chanting kum-by-ya naked around campfires?

Rossi: Oh, it's no myth my boy. The Pace is a mystical force that flows through all riders and motorcycles. If you can master it, it can be your greatest ally. Here, I have something for you.

(Retrieves an odd looking motorcycle with ducting vanes hidden under the fairing. Vinales jumps aboard and revs the engine excitedly.)

Rossi: This motorcycle belonged to your predecessor, and it served him well.

Vinales: You knew my predecessor?

Rossi: Oh yes. We had a... complicated relationship. He was a great Champion of the Pace, before he was overthrown by Darth Rider. This motorcycle is yours now, but be careful. The Pace can tempt you to override if you are weak. Now come, if we are to get this message out there is someone that we need to meet.

EXTERIOR: Vinales and Rossi hop aboard a rusted U-Hauler and pull the bike to the practice track. There they are stopped by a squadron of Imperial Tech Direction troopers.

Trooper: Hold it. Are those winglets under those fairings? Winglets and strakes aren't allowed on fairings after 2016. You can't bring that in here.

Rossi: (Waving hands) These aren't the fairings you're looking for.

Trooper: These aren't the fairings we're looking for.

Rossi: We can be on our way.

Trooper: Go on, be on your way.

INTERIOR: The Mos Isley Snack Bar is a rough and tumble cantina full of unsavory characters. In a dark and smoke filled corner, one such man shoots a rival and boots the corpse out of his booth as Rossi and Vinales take their seat.

Rossi: It's been a long time, Marc.

Marquez: What do you want, old man?

Rossi: The Ducati Empire is launching a new aerodynamic offensive. We have important information that we must get out to the rest of the paddock if we're going to have any hope of beating them.

Marquez: Why should I help you? I've the RCV in my garage, and that's plenty.

Vinales: That bucket of bolts?

Marquez: "That bucket of bolts" did the Kessel run in 12 parsecs, won Qatar in 2014 and got 3rd in 2016. What have you got?

Vinales: ...

Marquez: Besides, we've made some improvements that I think will make us pretty competitive this year. Plus they're removable so that gives us a bit of an edge compared to that cobbled-together scrap heap that you carted out back.

Rossi: (Leaning in) Marc, you know I win Qatar in 2015, and was on the podium in 2014. I know this track and what it takes to go fast. But this... thing that Ducati has developed... It's unlike anything you've ever seen before. Trust me, if we don't work together this may be the end of motorcycle design as we know it.

Marquez: Is that so? (Pause) Okay, let's say that I believe you. What's our first step?

Rossi: (Standing) We need to rescue Lowes. Aprilia might be the key to breaking this entire thing open. We'll go from there.

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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 03-22-2017, 06:33 PM
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I enjoy the great stories, hope you can keep them up. It is going to be interesting what happens with the fairing designs...

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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 03-23-2017, 05:40 AM Thread Starter
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It's a case of real irony that in banning the winglets out of fear of an F1 style aerodynamic war, technical direction has actually created the most F1 like fairing ever. Aprilia said that they didn't think something that dramatic would be allowed, but now that they know it opens up some interesting possibilities. The mid-season upgrades should be phenomenal.

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